Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
