i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Randomize