I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
