just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
