what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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