Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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