you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
so that wasnt chicken after all
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
