There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Less talking, more tequila
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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