i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
