Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
