In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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