the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
he puts the penis in happiness.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
