idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
