This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
