Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
