singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
