So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
