im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
you made out with another girl for some wings
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
