...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize
