if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
