And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
