We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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