I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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