Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
