you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
