did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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