Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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