She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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