I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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