new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
