i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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