Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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