he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
