today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
This gyro tastes like lonliness
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
