had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
