Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize