Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
sarcasm needs its own font
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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