Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
