Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
