I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
