Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I can't trust your balls anymore.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
