And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
