id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
so let's talk penis.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
