i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Randomize
