It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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