They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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