Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
