apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
