she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Randomize
