How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
